In a world where “vibes” and first impressions reign supreme, one thing is still dangerously overlooked when choosing who to love, trust, or even keep around: **emotional intelligence.**
And it’s time you hear this loud and clear—**some people aren’t just bad partners, they’re emotional hazards.**
In a now viral quote by author and speaker Maria Consiglio, she delivers a soul-shaking wake-up call that’s making millions rethink who they let into their lives:
> “Be careful about having relationships with people with no emotional intelligence. They will never understand you, they will personalize everything, and you will never be seen and heard…”
It’s more than just wise words. It’s a survival guide for your heart. If no one has ever warned you—**this is your sign.**
Emotional Intelligence Isn’t a Luxury—It’s a Lifeline
Too often, we look for the “funny one,” the “hot one,” or the “ambitious one” and forget to ask the real question that will determine whether you grow… or break:
**Does this person have emotional intelligence?**
That means:
* Can they understand their own emotions?
* Can they regulate them without exploding, ghosting, or sulking?
* Can they recognize how *you* feel, too?
If the answer is no, **you’re not in a relationship—you’re in emotional war.**
The Red Flags Are Real (And They’re Dangerous)
Maria’s viral message didn’t sugarcoat it—and neither should we.
Here’s what you’re really signing up for if you ignore emotional intelligence:
People With No Emotional Intelligence Will NEVER Understand You**
They’ll hear your words—but not your meaning. They’ll nod at your pain—but not *feel* it.
Why? Because they don’t get emotions. Period.
* You’ll express a boundary—they’ll call you “dramatic.”
* You’ll try to open up—they’ll get defensive.
* You’ll ask for clarity—they’ll accuse you of overthinking.
It’s not love. It’s **emotional starvation**.
They Will Take Everything Personally
Say goodbye to healthy conversations. People without emotional intelligence make everything about them.
* You’re upset? They’ll say you’re attacking them.
* You’re quiet? They assume you’re cheating.
* You’re busy? You’re “abandoning” them.
There’s no space for you in the relationship—only their *interpretation* of you.
People Without Self-Awareness Will Eventually Hurt You**
Imagine dating someone who has NO idea how their tone, sarcasm, silence, or control affects others.
* They blow up and act like it’s normal.
* They manipulate and call it “passion.”
* They break you, then blame you for bleeding.
They don’t grow because they don’t know.
And you will suffer the cost of their ignorance.
Their Rage Will Rule the Relationship
Emotional regulation is what separates a healthy partner from a walking disaster.
People who **can’t regulate their emotions** will:
Slam doors instead of communicating.
Lash out instead of listening.
Apologize… but never actually change.
You’ll spend your days on edge, **tiptoeing through emotional landmines**. One wrong move, and BOOM—chaos.
People Without Empathy Will Never Care How You Feel
They might say “I love you,” but they won’t check on you when you’re sick.
They’ll expect your support—but never show up when *you* need it.
They’ll forget your fears, your triggers, your humanity.
And when you finally call them out, they’ll say:
> “I didn’t know it was such a big deal.”
Of course they didn’t. **They don’t feel anything that isn’t theirs.**
If No One Has Ever Told You… Maria Just Did.
Her quote ends with the truth most people never hear in time:
> “Look for people in your life with emotional intelligence, self-awareness, empathy and the ability to regulate their emotions—or you will be at the mercy of their dysfunction and pay the price for their immaturity and lack of growth.”
Let that sink in.
You will **pay the price** for their lack of work.
You will be **punished** for their refusal to grow.
You will be **used** as their emotional punching bag.
Until you finally say ENOUGH.
What To Look For Instead
Here’s the real checklist that should replace “tall, dark, and handsome” or “funny and spontaneous”:
Do they take responsibility for their actions?
Can they apologize and change?
Do they understand how you feel without making it about them?
Can they manage stress without hurting you?
Do they care about their impact on others?
This is what love looks like. Not fireworks. Not chaos. **Safety, clarity, growth.**
Final Word: You Deserve More Than Survival
You weren’t born to survive someone else’s trauma.
You weren’t made to fix someone who refuses to do the work.
You are not the rehab center for emotionally underdeveloped adults.
If someone doesn’t have emotional intelligence, self-awareness, empathy, or regulation skills—**it’s not your job to teach them.**
It’s your job to **protect your peace.**
As Maria Consiglio says, **be careful.**
Because the wrong person won’t just waste your time…
**They’ll break your spirit.**
**If no one has ever told you this before—let it be known today:**
You deserve someone who understands, someone who listens, someone who *feels* with you—not just for you.
Look for emotional intelligence.
**Or you’ll lose yourself trying to explain what they’ll never be capable of hearing.**
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